" " ----Harold Southend, Clan MalkavianPART A: The Camarilla's Plan
The method was to provide minor annoyances to the elder's lives (at first), the proceed to relentless annoyances...then proceed to major annoyances, then proceed to the relentless major annoyances, and finally hit them with a Catch-22 situation in which they are forced to leave the city. Perhaps fortunately, they stayed such a short period of time that we weren't able to escalate much.
Rather than explain what we did to each elder, I'm going to upload a file, nxnw.txt, to the ftp site and let you peruse it at your leisure.
It also became clear that one of the "Camarilla Dupes" (Isabeau, Steven or Maxwell) would crack and tell the elders that the "Malkies are up to something." So they beat them to the punch by mailing the elders each a cheery little letter saying that they would be the target of a massive conspiracy to make their lives hell, and giving both the name of the person behind it, and his phone number, in case they wanted to talk with him.
Here's how it broke down:
Brujah elder. Left long, threatening messages on machine, but wasn't dumb enough to try to get out of it. Elders 1, Malkavians 0.
Gangrel elder. Didn't arrive in town until night of meeting, and left immediately afterwards. ("Obviously scared to death!") Elders 1, Malkavians 1.
Malkavian elder. Got into it. Assisted in pranking self, Tucson Malkavians and others. A win for both sides. Elders 2, Malkavians 2.
Nosferatu elder. Hid his ugly face and didn't dare poke it out of the sewers. Elders 2, Malkavians 3.
Toreador elder. Hit mortal conspirators with Awe, which derailed the Malkavian plan, but was too good at it, and so developed an equally annoying following of homeless people who would just follow her around and stare at her. Elders 2, Malkavians 4.
Tremere elder. Our greatest success. Cracked immediately and fled to the Chantry. Elders 2, Malkavians 5.
Ventrue elder. Managed to function very well despite pranks. Elders 3, Malkavians 5.
So by the time the meeting rolled around, the elders were ready for a major bargaining session, and had lots of "cookies" ready to hand out to people in exchange for their support, knowing that the Malkavians, no matter how annoying they may be, simply cannot outbid them. And the Camarilla Dupes put their plans into action too, as it became obvious that something was going on...
At a small meeting previous to the elders meeting, the Camarilla Dupes (gosh, I need to come up with a less insulting name than that, they're really quite competent and very scary, and would be the most powerful coterie in Tucson if we determined power in any ordinary, sane, rational way in this city...) met with Dmitri and Harold, and let it slip that the elders were coming down to sign a written agreement. Harold looks absolutely ecstatic at this information, but of course, nobody pays any attention.
Harold grabs Dmitri after the meeting (in an area that isn't particularly sensitive) and babbles at him for a while. The upshot is that Dmitri should, through some subterfuge, get a copy of the written agreement to Harold before the meeting. Dmitri, who A) is one of the "problem people" identified by the Camarilla as needing convincing, and B) was throwing a party to which the elders were invited the next night, figures it won't be so hard, and agrees, thinking that he might know what Harold is thinking of doing, and then realizing that the fact that he might know is far more frightening than the risk he is undertaking to find out...
So the next night, with very little problem, he gets the Ventrue elder to show him the agreement...he very slowly reads the agreement, in full view of the incredibly clear security video cameras being manned by his Gangrel buddy Jack Dawson...says "Well, I'll need to think it over," gives it back to the Ventrue elder, and gets the tape to Harold (who is busy organizing a paintball drive-by shooting of the Toreador elder).
Harold then changes four words in the document, all in the preambulatory clauses, and where it says "Presented by William Mason Grosvenor on behalf of the Inner Council of the Camarilla", he writes "Presented by Harold Robert Southend Junior on behalf of the City of Tucson", takes it to Kinko's, duplicates it onto paper and fonts identical to the actual agreement, takes it back to Dmitri, and says "Sell this."
And Dmitri does.
He gets a lot of people to sign the paper, one from each clan in Tucson (except for the Tremere, who he couldn't find, and the Camarilla Dupes, who he thought about, but then giggled at what he thought the look on their faces would be, and ignored...).
The stage is set for...
The second thing that happened was that Harold stood up and agreed with him, volubly, at great length, and with so little coherence that only a few were able to pick up on exactly what he was talking about. As the news spread, the Camarilla dupes were slightly shocked and the elders were completely thrown off: Harold was the one that had organized the conspiracy to prank them 24 hours a day and, according to the letter they got from him, make their lives "living hell."
The third thing that happened was that Dmitri handed up the agreement with all the signatures at the bottom. "We're ready for you to sign...you know we could have just faxed this to you..." Harold adds that the main advantage to this agreement is that it has signatures on it. The Camarilla Dupes went ballistic. "What the hell kind of agreement are you talking about, Dmitri?" While the argument rages, the Camarilla elders look over Harold/Dmitri's agreement and get more and more confused...it is nearly exactly theirs, word for word, and they haven't presented theirs formally yet. The Ventrue attempts to present his, and Harold insists that he won't accuse the Ventrue of plagiarism. "Also, there's signatures on this one."
At that point, all idea of a normal meeting was essentially thrown out the window. Total bedlam reigned. Major politicking. Major maneuvering on both sides and between both sides.
It didn't help that Isabeau, (one of the CDs), had arranged for the Malkavians to be hit with a curse that night (two traits down, and urk the Malkavian Madness Network turns off...), and so right in the midst of all of this craziness, the Malkies are all slowly going sane and completely falling apart. (This is why I missed so much of the game.)
Finally, the elders all sign the document. The Camarilla proposal is summarily dropped. And just as the Toreador affixes her name to it, the lights go out and she gets offed by someone or something. One of the really nasty werewolves from the Lupine meeting two weeks ago comes in shortly afterwards, bellowing about violations of the agreement. Steven & Rosa (the Tremere Regent, and an Apprentice), get whomped on by someone or something. Total craziness reigns, but the Ventrue elder keeps his cool and announces calmly that the agreement is binding, that a Justicar will be down soon to look into the Toreador's death, and that they'd be leaving the next day.
The three permanent members of the council are Dmitri, Harold and Steven. (the way Dmitri described it was a lot like the Security Council: those members are always there, and other members are added and subtracted at the behest of those three. F'rinstance, if we were talking about Lupines, we'd add a bunch of Gangrel to the council, etc.)
--------Jimmy Buffett
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